Can Tension Lead to More Pleasure?

A Deliberate Orgasm Article

People experience a lot of tension in our world today. However, there is a phenomenon that is not often recognized that could change all that tension into a path to more pleasure.

What is tumescence?

Pronunciation: \tü-‘me-sen(t)s

The dictionary defines tumescence as:

  1. A swelling or an enlargement
  2. The quality or state of being tumescent: readiness for sexual activity marked especially by an accumulation of blood in the sex organs

From a sensualist’s viewpoint, a more encompassing definition of tumescence is the buildup of tension in the body. Detumescence is the waning of tension.

Tumescence is stored energy, unreleased. Tumescence is always present in a woman’s body, but the amount of this tension in her body ebbs and flows in intensity every day throughout her entire life.

When a woman is experiencing a high level of tumescence in her body, it can FEEL like tension. It can feel like that to her, and it can feel like that to the people around her too – stressful. It is in these situations where there is a high level of tumescence, that people are challenged to have any fun or pleasure relating to each other at all. So, how can you recognize this level of tumescence? And once you do recognize it, how do you have more FUN with it?

Signs of a woman experiencing a high level of tumescence will show up in different ways. Some of the signs are a woman talking very quickly where you may have a difficult time following what she says or understanding her communications. Or a woman might start crying or laughing for no particular reason. She could be feeling stressed out or bitchy. She might have sensitivity to loud jangly noises, or an aversion to light touch.

Being an avid observer of a woman and her cycles of tumescence, you can get to know her better and have more fun with her. What women want is to have attention and to have their body taken care of, to be detumesced. When you put your attention on her, you may begin to notice the many ways a woman uses and releases this energy. These ways can be deliberate or they can be by default.

Some of the ways that a woman can deliberately be detumesced are exercising, cleaning, organizing, masturbating, having sex, taking a bath, getting a massage, having her hair brushed, having a good conversation, or laughing. All of these methods detumesce a woman deliberately and pleasurably.

Some of the ways that a woman will be detumesced by default are bumping into furniture, tripping, falling, arguing, fighting, causing or engaging in drama.

When you notice a woman and the tumescence she has in her body, you can make offers that are pleasurable to her.

As a man, you can run a menu of things that you think would pleasurably detumesce her. For example, “How about if I run you a bath?” or “Would you like to go for a walk together?” or “How about I DO you?” Putting your non-judgmental attention on her is detumescing.

As a woman, you don’t need to be victimized by the intensity of the energy you feel in your body either. Tumescence is stored energy, unreleased. When you notice tension, a tool you can use to have more fun is to identify it as tumescence. Then take a moment to consider detumescing deliberately. You can choose to take care of your body – acknowledge the tension that you are feeling and release it pleasurably.

When tension in everyday life is recognized as tumescence, the potential exists for both men and women to have more fun together, exploiting the buildup of tension for what it is.


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If you enjoyed this article, you may also enjoy The Technique of Peaking and Extended Orgasm where you learn to build progressively higher and more intense orgasmic peaks.